| 1. | Wearing clothing that is plain, unattractive, colorless, ill-fitting, in need of repair—in order to avoid attention or attraction from others, or to avoid the possibility of a relationship and sex. |
| 2. | Taking pride in not needing sex. |
| 3. | Considering being sexual wrong or a weakness, even for a married person. |
| 4. | Manipulating circumstances, when in a relationship that normally would include sex, in order to avoid the possibility of sex, such as going to bed later than the partner, redirecting conversation, refusing romantic advances, etc., (when the partner is not an addict or abuser). |
| 5. | In addition to sexual inhibition, avoiding social contact, having relationships that are not very close, or being restricted emotionally. |
The next list of characteristics is from the book, “Sexual Anorexia: Overcoming Sexual Hatred by Patrick Carnes, PhD, a very good source of extensive information about sexual anorexia. Buy the Book |
| 6. | Dread of sexual pleasure. |
| 7. | Persistent fear of sexual contact. |
| 8. | Obsessive vigilance about sexual matters. |
| 9. | Avoidance of anything connected with sex. |
| 10. | Preoccupation with other people being sexual. |
| 11. | Distortions about the appearance of one’s body. |
| 12. | Extreme loathing of body functions. |
| 13. | Obsessional self-doubt about sexual adequacy. |
| 14. | Rigid, judgmental attitudes about sexual behavior. |
| 15. | Excessive fear and preoccupation with sexually transmitted diseases. |
| 16. | Obsessive concern or worry about the sexual intentions of others. |
| 17. | Shame and self-loathing over sexual experiences [that others would usually
consider normal]. |
| 18. | Despair about sexual adequacy and functioning. |
| 19. | Avoiding intimacy because of sexual fear. |
| 20. | Self-destructive behavior to limit, stop, or avoid sex. |
These additional characteristics are among those identified by members of Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, a 12-step recovery program that recognizes sexual anorexia as a form of sex and love addiction:
|
| 21. | Fear of being attracted to someone. |
| 22. | Fear of starting or exiting a relationship. |
| 23. | Deprivation (sexually, emotionally, etc.). |
| 24. | Self-belittling and judgmental. |
| 25. | Distancing strategies (avoidance of dating, avoidance of intimate friendships, behaving in a grandiose or inferior manner, avoidance of the company of others, withdrawal or isolation from partner, etc.) |
| 26. | …making oneself “small” and “unseen” in group situations, keeping secrets, pretending to be “too busy” all the time, etc. |
| 27. | Addictive obsession with unavailable people. |
